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{{Infobox character|image = 2req.gif|imagewidth = 280|title = Republican Jesus|position = God and Saviour of the Republicans|religiousaffiliation = [[Christianity]]|placeofbirth = The good 'ol Obamaless nation of 'murica|placeofresidence = On the throne of the Republican heaven|status = Ruling over the Republican [[Heaven]] and listening to the prayers of [[Republican Party|the true patriotic Americans]]|age = Was born on February 6, 1911 to a virgin mother and returned to the Republican [[Heaven]] on June 5, 2004|eyecolour = Blue|haircolour = Dark Brown}}'''Ronald Reagan''' is the one true [[Republican Party|Republican]] [[God]]. In the 1980's he single-handedly saved the world from [[Communism|communists]], <s>fascists</s>, [[Atheism|atheists]], [[:Category:Females|women]], [[Liberalism|liberals]], [[The Vigilant Christian|homosexuals]], sexual immorality, AR-15 machine guns, abortion, big government, taxes, [[:Category:Blacksters|Darkies]], [[Mexico|Mexicans]], [[Climate Change|climate change]] scams and [[:Category:Masturbation|basic freedoms]].
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{{Infobox character|image = 2req.gif|imagewidth = 280|title = Republican Jesus|position = God and Saviour of the Republicans|religiousaffiliation = [[Christianity]]|placeofbirth = The good 'ol Obamaless nation of 'murica|placeofresidence = On the throne of the Republican heaven|status = Ruling over the Republican [[Heaven]] and listening to the prayers of [[Republican Party|the true patriotic Americans]]|age = Was born on February 6, 1911 to a virgin mother and returned to the Republican [[Heaven]] on June 5, 2004|eyecolour = Blue|haircolour = Dark Brown}}'''Ronald Reagan''' (more appropriately, '''Saint Ronnie the Absent Minded''') is the one true [[Republican Party|Republican]] [[God]]. In the 1980's he single-handedly saved the world from [[Communism|communists]], <s>fascists</s>, [[Atheism|atheists]], [[:Category:Females|women]], [[Liberalism|liberals]], [[The Vigilant Christian|homosexuals]], sexual immorality, AR-15 machine guns, abortion, big government, taxes, [[:Category:Blacksters|Darkies]], [[Mexico|Mexicans]], [[Climate Change|climate change]] scams and [[:Category:Masturbation|basic freedoms]].
   
 
He led [[United States|the United States]] through the devastating War On Drugs and tried his damnedest to combat the [[AIDS]] virus. After the [[Satanism|Constitution]] forbade him to run again, America became 50,000% less free. [[TJ Kirk|TJ]] has predicted that Reagan will return to defeat [[Barack Obama|Obama]] and his legion of [[Brett Keane's Family|niggers]] with his cape of gold and his spectre of ornate destiny. This will be the greatest event in history, making Jesus cum the hardest he ever has or ever will.
 
He led [[United States|the United States]] through the devastating War On Drugs and tried his damnedest to combat the [[AIDS]] virus. After the [[Satanism|Constitution]] forbade him to run again, America became 50,000% less free. [[TJ Kirk|TJ]] has predicted that Reagan will return to defeat [[Barack Obama|Obama]] and his legion of [[Brett Keane's Family|niggers]] with his cape of gold and his spectre of ornate destiny. This will be the greatest event in history, making Jesus cum the hardest he ever has or ever will.

Latest revision as of 04:32, September 18, 2019

Ronald Reagan (more appropriately, Saint Ronnie the Absent Minded) is the one true Republican God. In the 1980's he single-handedly saved the world from communists, fascists, atheists, women, liberals, homosexuals, sexual immorality, AR-15 machine guns, abortion, big government, taxes, Darkies, Mexicans, climate change scams and basic freedoms.

He led the United States through the devastating War On Drugs and tried his damnedest to combat the AIDS virus. After the Constitution forbade him to run again, America became 50,000% less free. TJ has predicted that Reagan will return to defeat Obama and his legion of niggers with his cape of gold and his spectre of ornate destiny. This will be the greatest event in history, making Jesus cum the hardest he ever has or ever will.

Quotes Edit

  • "If we ever forget that we are One Nation Under God, then we will be a nation gone under." [1]
  • "Freedom prospers when religion is vibrant and the rule of law under God is acknowledged." [2]
  • "Without God, democracy will not and cannot long endure." [3]
  • "We are never defeated unless we give up on God." [4]
  • "We have the duty to protect the life of an unborn child." [5]

Trivia Edit

File:Ronald Reagan.jpeg
  • It is widely expected that he will serve a 10th term as President of the United States, under the Hillary Clinton persona.
  • We are still feeling the effects of him fucking up the American economy several decades ago.
  • We are all thankful he's dead.
  • Ronald is a closeted Clopsexual.

References Edit

  1. https://archive.is/99CQu
  2. https://archive.is/QUKiV
  3. https://archive.is/bSGRk
  4. https://archive.is/lo7Lc
  5. https://archive.is/8PEGG
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