Libertarianism (or kleptocracy) is a political ideology which focuses on freedom from the restriction of citizen's rights by the government, and advocates for the rights of anyone to do anything they wish, excluding violent crimes.


The most integral part of Libertarianism is worship of the free market. Libertarians are confident that the free market will end world hunger, cure cancer, provide mansions to everyone who works hard and jerk them off before they go to sleep every night... eventually.

Adam Cockish is the most prominent Libertarian that has been on the show.Template:Quote/url

Five Pillars Of Libertarianism

  1. There is no god except the Free Market, and Ron Paul is the Free Market's Messenger.
  2. You must subvert the government 5 times a day while facing in the direction of Ron Paul's house.
  3. Give 40% of your income to the poor and the needy, in order to prove that charity is more effective than government. If you'd rather keep all your money for yourself, you're free to do that too.
  4. Fasting and self-control on August 20, Ron Paul's birthday.
  5. Pilgrimage to Pittsburgh at least once in a lifetime if able.


  • Are you a libertarian and reading this page? Well congrats, you're a fucking hypocrite because the internet was created by THE BIG BAD GUMMIT! Not only that, but the HTML code (the language that most websites use) was developed by CERN (European Organization for Nuclear Research), which is also government funded.
  • Despite the fact that a large amount of them pretty much worship Ayn Rand, she is actually critical of Libertarianism.
  • The far less extreme and more reasonable version of them are Classic Liberals.


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