Episode 167 is an episode of the Drunken Peasants.
Prev: Episode 166
Next: Episode 168
- Featured Video: TVC loses his virginity
- A new Crazy People Segment intro
- Paul sings a song situation about the individual Brett Keane. - 0:28:55
- Troll or Not a Troll Segment: A bald black guy requesting to be starred in "Fart male white" porn.
- Crazy People Segment: Bill Nye Isn't A Real Scientist (not found)
- Evan Lefavor: Cookin Up A Beat With Evan Lefavor
- Are Atheists Repressing The Truth? (not found)
- The War On Animals (not found)
- Ernie Tertelgte: Mountain Man ernie tertelgte before court
- Fox News: Bill O'Reilly "Debunks" Liberal Trying To Lower College Tuition (not found)
- To Devon Tracey:
- PAULEGO IS THE LIVING MAN
Start Of The Show
The episode started off with the Drunken Peasants featuring an edited video of The Vigilant Christian (created by a DP wiki staff member named Sky Clad Observer), making Mario off as even more crazy than usual. Paul talked about his immense knowledge of knobs. They talked about the cold hard truth of #WeWereThere and the Brett Keane situation. They watched a Troll or Not a Troll video about some black guy who wants to be in a "black funnel noodle white chicken cream fart" porn with blonde white guys; the peasants were totally lost. All the peasants besides Paul concluded that this guy was not a troll.
The moved into the Crazy People Segment with a brand new intro. Before they began, Paul sang in his Brett Keane voice, showing off his prowess as a Butt King historian. Next up, the Febreze Guy tries to refute Bill Nye and his credentials as a 'scientist'. He claims that he's merely an actor and not a real scientist, even though that's actually complete bullshit. Bill Nye is well established as a mechanical engineer. He also says that Bill Nye knows nothing about science while he himself also once said that Febreze is a tool of the Illuminati. Then, a discount Jamie Hyneman named Evan Lefavor cooked up a beat by smacking together some pots, pans, and other kitchen utensils.
Next, some creepy-looking bald motherfucker started claiming that atheists are just repressing the truth. The peasants explained how he's doing the same tap dance as most of the ignorant creationists like it's a recited poem. TJ compared Heaven to the Judeo-Christian God's personal little "safe space" because the people who go to heaven are forced to praise and worship God forever. They watched a video about a crippled old white man in a pink bandanna trying to get Donald Trump's attention for a mere 30-minute interview.
Middle Of The Show
After the peasants finished the video by the old redneck, they took a short break. They returned and did some shilling for FanDuel. After that, Ernie the Living Man held a hilarious nonsensical sign with the most atrocious grammar known to man. While the sign was in his hand, Ernie was talking to a crowd of nobody but spoke as if he was giving a speech before the proletariat masses.
Then, Bill O'Reilly argued with some liberal woman on Fox News about whether or not if there should be a lower college tuition in the United States and tries to refute her arguments with weasel words. Ben stated that tuition is going up twice a year and they're not even close to adjusting with inflation. They talked about the methods that colleges employ, such as charging students up the ass for petty things like shitty textbooks. Paul told a story about his own college experiences with textbooks: one of his professors said that he may not even have to use the book at all. They also brought up Bill's lack of concern for excessive military spending. TJ encourages the fans to tweet to Bill O'Reilly that he's a cunt.
End Of The Show
The peasants covered a video by an anonymous guy with a mask sending a message to Devon Tracey. The man behind the mask criticized Tracey's double standard about what he believes is progressive. TJ agreed with the video but suggested that he remove the fucking audio filter. They then watched a video of Ernie the Living Man with an audio recording of Paul's Ego edited over it.
The peasants then listened to some Storytime With Paul. Paul told a story about a shitty night he had at a condo he shared with some other sweaty men who nearly drove him nuts. He managed to get high on some great
pot pan. One of Paul's dumbass roommates cut a hole in his ballsack with kitchen scissors when he was shaving his balls. This roommate was subsequently sent to the emergency room.
This somehow led into another story about an orgy that occurred in the same condo involving some stripper his roommates had hired. A little Japanese kid named Yoshi came to the condo looking for the stripper who was apparently his girlfriend and Paul ended up shutting the fucking door on his ass. Paul came in and interrupted the orgy his roommates were having to alert them about Yoshi. Upon entering the bedroom, Paul witnessed that the two roommates and this stripper were engaging in a sexual position called "The Wobbly H". This "Wobby H" sex position involved the stripper getting anally penetrated by roommate 1's cock in a doggy style position while preforming a fellatio on roommate 2 whom was on his knees. The story ended with Yoshi throwing a fit and leaving, Paul intended the story to be a life lesson for the drunken audience. After listening to Paul's stories, they wrapped up the show.
- "Fuck you, DaveCreator!" - Scotty tells it like it is.
- "You and I are both knob experts in different ways." - Paul's Ego.
- "Let me apologize, my dew rag smells of cat piss..." - Paul's impression of the crazy Trump guy.
- "Being poor is not child abuse." - The lady on Fox News who had to explain shit to Bill O. Reilly as if he's a little fucking kid.
- This was the first DP episode to broadcast in full HD 1080p.
- The peasants shouted out the DP Wiki (twice motherfuckers!), causing the most orgasms on any DP episode since the last appearance of Mercedes Carrera.
- Brett Keane ruined the words "situation" and "individual" for the rest of time.
- TJ describes himself as the leader of Drunken Peasants.
- Bill O'Reilly was taking it up the ass from the devil the whole show. That was why he was spewing out evil nonsense
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